My Legacy

Posted on 4th May 2011 in advice/ legacy/ pride/ validation

My boys

Just been thinking, if I could only pick one thing to pass on to my boys – what would it be?

Just one thing. One piece of information, one trait, or one word of advice.

It would be:

Don’t require validation.

Sure, I hope they’ll be happy, healthy, wealthy and loved.

I hope they’ll be clever, get good jobs and be a success.

I hope they’ll find true love and be surrounded by friends and laughter.

I hope they’ll be good people who make me proud.


I think if they can learn to love who they are, irrespective of the approval of others, then the rest will fall into place.

I want them to like what they like, because they like it, not because it’s cool.

I want them to act how they like, to be carefree and go with their instincts.

I want them to love freely. And if that person doesn’t love them back, I want them to be able to let go and know that they are worth loving and not to waste their tears on someone who can’t see that.

My boys are amazing. They make me so proud, every day.

I want them to know that, but not need to know that. To be happy in their own skin and love themselves for everything they are and everything that they will be.


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  • Reply helloitsgemma 4th May 2011 at 6:41 pm

    wise, wise words. I strive for the same – saw your suitcase – hope May is better XX

  • Reply Him Up North 4th May 2011 at 9:16 pm

    I’m rarely moved by a blog post but you got me. x

  • Reply fleetwoodboy 4th May 2011 at 9:42 pm

    Really lovely blog CC. There’s do many kids out there that cry out for the love of s good mother

  • Reply If I Could Escape 5th May 2011 at 6:30 am

    Could not agree more. I want the same for my boys too. Great post

  • Reply Bob Greig 5th May 2011 at 6:37 am

    Great stuff CC !!

    If I can be really honest, the last line made me laugh, but on second reading I don’t think it belongs at the end of such a wonderful piece.

    Bob X

  • Reply Single Dad's Diary 6th May 2011 at 12:29 pm

    I agree 100%! If a person is happy with themselves, they will have confidence in everything that they do and will be more likely to succeed in love and life.

    And I thought that the last line was perfect- a lighthearted finale to a poignant post.

  • Reply @FayC 9th May 2011 at 2:53 pm

    Beautiful piece, sensitively written. Sensible, thoughtful and thought provoking. I am sure your boys know what a wonderful mother they have. And definately keep the last line in!

  • Reply Mother’s Day Meme « coffeecurls 21st March 2012 at 8:31 pm

    […] I hope they learn to be happy with themselves and not require external validation. I summed this up in one of my favourite ever posts, called My Legacy. […]

  • Reply thefamilypatch2015 13th April 2015 at 7:38 pm

    This is such a beautiful and powerful post, something we all need to learn in life and so often forget! I am sure that with this focus in your heart, your boys will grow up to know their own value :) #sharethejoy

  • Reply Michelle Reeves (bodfortea) 14th April 2015 at 8:58 pm

    Oh goodness what a powerful and wonderful message and the most amazing legacy for your boys. I totally LOVE this and will be sharing and pinning to my favs board. Thank you so much for linking this up at #sharethejoy

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